He Said: Relationship identity crisis

Flashback to 2005

SHE and I have been together 14 months. Although I wouldn’t trade a single day for anything else, each day forward serves as a reminder of something more permanent. At least now I'm able to consider the possibility. It was only a few short months ago that the very notion was unthinkable (and "unmentionable"). Some days I can imagine myself spending the rest of our lives together. Other days I’m terrified by the idea.

We may share a lot of passions and interests, but there are also some very big differences between us. The 2 biggies are Family and Religion. It’s funny, but for 2 frank and totally honest people, we hardly ever really discuss the whole “religion” thing. So let me break it down for you: I’m Jewish and she’s not. 99% of the time it’s no big deal, but then suddenly it is…

Perhaps we both know how big of a deal it is and just choose to ignore it. Or maybe we’re scared that it could be the one thing that keeps us apart in the end. And still, we do everything in our power to avoid the subject. I suppose that’s typical of most new “serious” relationships. Once you get comfortable with someone, it’s easy to lapse into tired habits. I know in many of my past failed relationships, there reached a point where I began to feign interest in whatever the ex-SHE happened to be saying. Thankfully, that isn’t a problem with the current SHE as I’m fascinated by almost everything she has to say. Almost.

But still, there are differences to overcome. The most obvious being our families. SHE is your “untypical” typical southern belle – minus the accent. Her parents couldn’t be more different than mine. Everything in her household revolved around religion and church camp. No drinking, no smoking, no swearing, no politics allowed. Unless you’re voting Republican.

You can imagine this makes for an exciting (and unpredictable) dinner experience whenever her parents are in town. If you’re sitting at a nearby table, that is. For me, it's just a reminder that the one true thing we all have in common is SHE.