early Saturday morning with the dogs

I woke early this morning to the sound of our youngest puppy whimpering. I turned to my right and squinted at the clock. 6:00am. I must have groaned out loud because my older dog (who at 3 years has the smarts to sleep in on a Saturday), lifted his head in agreement and repeated the gesture, which only encouraged the puppy to whine louder.

“I’m up, I’m up” I announced to no one in particular as I let the puppy out of her cage. Like Dash out of The Incredibles, she shot out of her cage and did 3 fast laps around the condo. She was wired and ready to play. I just wanted to lie down.

Yawning, I gave her some water, which she quickly lapped up. Way too much water way too fast. I knew from experience that I had about a 180 second window to get her downstairs and outside before her bladder blew. I threw on some shoes, a hat and grabbed a coat. I didn’t realize until I was standing outside in the freezing cold that I had mistakenly grabbed my girlfriend’s coat.

Standing outside with the dogs, shivering in my PJs and girlfriend’s coat, I realized that the condo was empty when I left. There was no sign of GIRLFRIEND or her parents. Back inside, I found a note. They woke up early for a family fun shopping expedition out in the suburbs. Their destination: IKEA and JC Penney. I was pretty sure the stores didn’t open at 6am. But they were no where to be found.

And so I did what any man would do in such a situation. I went back to bed.

The thing I love best about GIRLFRIEND is that she’s smart enough to leave me behind. Shopping with the in-laws at IKEA at 6am on a Saturday really aint my thing. Not when I can be sleeping.